Each morning in the mirror he saw The stuff on his head needed more care, That mop on his top he couldn't adore, He wished that his hair just wasn't there! It needed a cut, a flat-top or crew … A bottle of bleach to make it fair? Anything done was long overdue; He wished that his hair just wasn't there! A part on the right, or even the middle - Any stylist had better beware. To make it look good, that was the riddle. He wished that his hair just wasn't there! What a mess, when his cap he did doff "A trendie I'll be; make people stare. Here's what I'll do, I'll shave it all off!" He wished that his hair just wasn't there! But to be made BALD, that would take guts. Well, it was his head, so he would dare. The decision was made, no 'if's or 'but's. He wished that his hair just wasn't there! Off to the tonsorial parlour No trim was this, nor taper nor square, This haircut would pluck up his valour He wished that his hair just wasn't there! "It's all up to you Mr Barber, Snip, Snip away with your usual flair Style cut is a wish I don't harbour" He wished that his hair just wasn't there! "Get it all off! I want me hairfree". Clipper and razor made his head bare. Shaven and shorn, a BALDIE was he. He wished that his hair just wasn't there! Chrome Dome, a ShaveHead, Bald of the Bonce, Smooth scalped as he hoped, free to the air Shiny and slick where tresses were once, He'd wished that his hair just wasn't there! Now he was happy, bald as a ball Polished and proud, that his head he did pare, His crowning glory - nothing at all Granted his wish; his hair wasn't there!